There was a woman, who had a friend. Kind of good, in her circle's friend.
The friendship remained till there was a huge fight, misunderstanding.
That woman, at her end of the frenship, cried out way too much.. at her deepest deep, lowest low. The friend said it was the woman's fault. And the woman didn't even remember the day that happened.. what the woman felt was emptiness, frustration of the way the friend treated her.
She cried, she really did. Badly.
She was hurt, she really was. Badly.
The pain she felt was so intense, that when she saw the friend, she could even pretend that the person she saw was just a complete stranger.
It went just like that, for months.
Then there was a day, they were in a same session for a presentation. The woman, as usual, pretended she didn't see him. Or maybe worst. She didnt even smile at the friend. She didn't even look at the friend. After the session, that friend texted her.. saying how he wanted to be friend again, to be just as they were before.
How hard more could that be for the woman? She's been trying hard to act normal, to forget that she once knew that friend.. but deep there, she knew she wanted to be friend again, but she couldn't bear the risk of another pain the friend would leave. She was wondering, whether or not she could accept the friendship, again. Through all the texts, they were better than a stranger, they texted, but never speaks in person. How would she have that courage?
They texted, but the woman was never in any intention of speaking to the friend, or smiling, or caring. Everytime she saw the friend, the only feeling she could felt was hatred. The most evil hatred. She forgave the friend, but not even once did she tolerate of forgetting what had happened.
Yeah. She was holding grudge. And she still is. She found joy in hurting the friend. She didn't even care anymore. To her, he was just an imaginary friend. That could never harm her. That would never hurt her.
She didn't even want to care.
That friend wanted to cheat? Carry on. She didn't mind at all. Why would she? Not that the friend was in her circle, not that the friend was her friend.
All she saw in the friend was somebody who made her cried, and there is possibility that it would again happen.
And today, the woman realise.. why did she accept the friend's friendship.. being able to have an imaginary friend was one thing.. but there was another reason.
Yes. The hatred. The grudge.
And now she understands more.
More about herself.
More about not caring about others.
And I understand her.
She is that kind of woman.
That woman is me.
The friendship remained till there was a huge fight, misunderstanding.
That woman, at her end of the frenship, cried out way too much.. at her deepest deep, lowest low. The friend said it was the woman's fault. And the woman didn't even remember the day that happened.. what the woman felt was emptiness, frustration of the way the friend treated her.
She cried, she really did. Badly.
She was hurt, she really was. Badly.
The pain she felt was so intense, that when she saw the friend, she could even pretend that the person she saw was just a complete stranger.
It went just like that, for months.
Then there was a day, they were in a same session for a presentation. The woman, as usual, pretended she didn't see him. Or maybe worst. She didnt even smile at the friend. She didn't even look at the friend. After the session, that friend texted her.. saying how he wanted to be friend again, to be just as they were before.
How hard more could that be for the woman? She's been trying hard to act normal, to forget that she once knew that friend.. but deep there, she knew she wanted to be friend again, but she couldn't bear the risk of another pain the friend would leave. She was wondering, whether or not she could accept the friendship, again. Through all the texts, they were better than a stranger, they texted, but never speaks in person. How would she have that courage?
They texted, but the woman was never in any intention of speaking to the friend, or smiling, or caring. Everytime she saw the friend, the only feeling she could felt was hatred. The most evil hatred. She forgave the friend, but not even once did she tolerate of forgetting what had happened.
Yeah. She was holding grudge. And she still is. She found joy in hurting the friend. She didn't even care anymore. To her, he was just an imaginary friend. That could never harm her. That would never hurt her.
She didn't even want to care.
That friend wanted to cheat? Carry on. She didn't mind at all. Why would she? Not that the friend was in her circle, not that the friend was her friend.
All she saw in the friend was somebody who made her cried, and there is possibility that it would again happen.
And today, the woman realise.. why did she accept the friend's friendship.. being able to have an imaginary friend was one thing.. but there was another reason.
Yes. The hatred. The grudge.
And now she understands more.
More about herself.
More about not caring about others.
And I understand her.
She is that kind of woman.
That woman is me.
posted from Bloggeroid
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